Sesame Street Addresses Divorce

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I grew up watching Sesame Street with my best friend and next door neighbor, Jonny.  We sat cross-legged on the floor, munching salted raw carrot sticks, while watching felt hand puppets dance across the television screen teaching us how to count or learn our A, B, Cs.  I can still recall my father’s expressions, as Jonny and I would run around the backyard shouting, “5! 5! 5! 5!  Let’s sing a song of 5!  How many is 5??”  Sesame Street taught us to be sensitive to our friends, respectful to our parents and teachers, and care for our environment.

Inviting Sesame Street into our homes was like inviting your best friend to come over and play.  And during those wonderful play dates, we talked about anything and everything.  So it’s no surprise that most recently, Sesame Street is introducing a new character, Abby Cadabby, to talk about the issues children face when their parents divorce.

A Child’s Perspective:

1. Two Separate, But Equal, Homes.  The transition from one family home to two separate homes can be scary for a child.  To ease the transition, try to make it seamless.  Don’t place unnecessary restrictions on the child, who may want to take stuffed animals or toys back and forth.  When possible, do refer to both homes as “home,” so that the child recognizes each house as his/her own.  And perhaps most importantly, don’t interfere if the child wants to spend an extra night with mommy or daddy, even if it’s in the middle of the timeshare period.

2. Meeting New Boy or Girl Friends.  This is a biggie, so take it slowly … don’t force new relationships on your children.  Many children develop relationships quickly, and won’t understand if your new “friend” suddenly disappears from their lives.  Be sensitive to the bonds that may be forged between your new love interest and your kids, and consider carefully the best time for the introductions.

3. Blended Families:  Step Parents, Step Siblings and Half Siblings.  As we learned on The Brady Bunch, “There are no steps in this house, Cindy!”  Once you’ve moved down the aisle and have introduced new members of your family to your biological children, take the time to communicate as a family how you hope the new relationships will develop.  And don’t expect overnight miracles.  Be open about rules and discipline, and set the boundaries so everyone has the same expectations.

4. Fault.  It is critical for moms and dads to repeatedly remind and assure a child that their divorce had nothing to do with the child’s behavior.  So often the child feels like he or she is to blame, and suffers silently, guilt

“Little Children, Big Challenges:  Divorce” is a kit designed to help children realize that they are not alone, and that their family, friends and neighbors are all there to offer support.  Through exploration of videos, games and resource guides, kids will learn that they are loved.

The reality is that divorce is no longer discussed in hushed tones.  With more than 50% of marriages ending in divorce, the issues addressed above are more commonplace than they were 20 years ago.  However commonplace though, our children still need our support to make an easy transition or better understand the dynamics happening around them.

Congratulations to Sesame Street for adding this topic to its programming!